If you didn’t know already, I’m ALL about providing insight into the “wedding world” and educating brides- in addition to sharing pretty wedding inspiration of course. And even though some of the information I share might not always be what you want to hear, it’s still SO important to know… because no matter what, the more you know about weddings, the BETTER your wedding will be, and in turn, the happier you will be!
So with that said, today we’re talking about a few things your wedding vendors won’t tell you…
Now, I’m not saying they won’t ever tell you these things, but they won’t tell you right off the bat. The thing is, knowing these few tidbits will make your experience of working with wedding vendors way better! I for one had no clue about any of these things when I was planning my wedding, but I certainly wish I had known!
1. Weekends don’t exist.
Okay, well weekends exist for you, but unfortunately, not for wedding vendors. Weddings happen Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, as you all know. If you are requesting a meeting during the weekend, chances are good that you probably won’t be able to get one. And if you’re emailing/calling during the weekend, just know that you might not get an immediate response.
Ask yourself this: Do you want your vendors answering emails and phone calls and taking meetings on your wedding day? I know I wouldn’t!
[Read more on this: 5 Things To Know About Wedding Vendors]
2. Since weekends don’t exist, days off (for vendors) happen during the week.
Vendors don’t have 2 free days during the weekend, because they’re most likely working those days. Because of this, “days off” usually occur during the week… even then, often times it’s only one day off. So when a wedding vendor doesn’t reply to your email in the normal speedy fashion on a Monday or Tuesday, it’s probably because it’s a “day off” for them- you know, trying to do laundry, buy food, clean- things that are necessary for a person to live. ;) Nowadays, most wedding pros will have an auto-responder turned on in their email, telling you this, but just in case, it’s helpful to be aware of this tidbit!
Ask yourself this: On your day off (or any other day really), do you like your boss calling and/or emailing when you don’t respond in less than 2 hours?
[Read more on this: Things To Keep In Mind When Communicating With Vendors]
3. A vendor’s product/service is their livelihood.
Sometimes vendors act like what they do is fabulous and fun (which it is of course), but they also make it seem like less work than it actually is. For some reason, a wedding vendor’s profession is immediately classified into a different “category” than say, an accountant or a realtor. Just because they’re providing you with a service or product related to your wedding, doesn’t mean that they’re any different than that accountant or realtor. I’ve said this before, but I’ll say it again- vendors charge what they charge, and they charge it for a reason. If you have to, ask, but don’t barter or try to talk them down. It’s truly how they’re putting food on the table, not just fun and games!
Ask yourself this: Do you want people who don’t do your job telling you what they think you should be paid?
[Read more on this: Working With Your Wedding Vendors]
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So now that you know these wondrous tidbits of knowledge, what can you do with them? Ask.
Ask your wedding vendors what their weeks are like, what days they take off when they have weddings all weekend, or if they prefer meetings on certain days of the week. Most vendors will usually ask you similar questions, because it helps them work with you smoothly and effectively. By asking them as well, you will be able to further establish an awesome relationship with your vendors. And when you have both have an awesome relationship, that will lead to an equally awesome wedding, and less stress for you! :)
Editor’s note: These are my own opinions based on my experiences as a wedding professional and a bride. Vendors, please feel free to add in your own “tidbits” in the comments below!
A version of this post was originally published in December 2010.
Lauren
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VERY good tips! Thanks Lauren :)
Hit the nail on the head Lauren. I think many of us do give the impression to clients that it’s all fun and light and we don’t mind working 7 days a week, but the reality is that we do deserve as much respect from our clients as we give them.
Good tips. I definitely don’t expect to hear back from my vendors right away. I always keep in mind they are most likely busy. That is why I let one email go and then if I don’t hear back for a couple days. Another email or call.
And remember that as your wedding approaches you will be in communication more. It’s great to get all your planning started early, but remember that vendors have clients who are immediately getting married (like this weekend) and your wedding is probably 9 months away. The priority usually goes to the closest client.
And remember that as your wedding approaches you will be in communication more. It’s great to get all your planning started early, but remember that vendors have clients who are immediately getting married (like this weekend) and your wedding is probably 9 months away. The priority usually goes to the closest client.
This is fantastic and everything I wish I could say but usually can’t. Thanks! Nate and I take Monday or Tuesdays off depending on the week. And thanks for that last point especially. ;)
Awesome post. Thanks Lauren for sharing!
This is great, thanks Lauren! So true how easy clients mistake our job as wedding vendors as so simple! I finally kept track, and October I was working over 70 hours a week and not taking any days off! Yikes!
Stumbled upon your blog and really enjoy it!
So very true!! I need to work on making days off a weekly occurrence :P
Amen to this post! Well said Lauren.
Kisses to you! Well said :)
This is all true but requires perspective. It is easy to think about the brides that get nervous about every minor detail and want their coordinator to hold their hand 24/7. But most of the responsibility does need to fall on the coordinator. If you do not want to be called 7 days a week then you need to make that clear to your clients.
Also, price negotiations are part of most industries so it is not unreasonable to expect it. It is okay for your prices to be non-negotiable but you need to communicate that to your clients as well.
Every wedding vendor pushes the idea that they are at the available to every whim of the client when they are trying to sell a contract. It is hypocritical to be upset when your highly emotional client was too blinded to understand that reality forces that to be an overstatement.
You are a smartie pants! These are all GREAT points for brides to be–I’d like to add that couples/brides planning their weddings don’t need to run every decision they make across their planner. Planners can give suggestions, but when push comes to shove, no one knows your tastes are preferences better than YOU and your fiance!
Never would have thought about some of these things…thanks for the insight!
Very good advice and SO true! It is easy to forget that wedding vendors have MANY more clients than just you not to mention personal lives!
Awesome post Lauren and so well said! It’s important for vendors to communicate their schedules to their client ms and equally important for clients to understand that us vendors like to have lives outside ofour jobs and routinely take a days and evenings off. Kudos on giving great honest advice!
This is awesome! Thank you so much for writing and sharing this. Loved it!
Such a great reminder! I know as a bride, I wanted an immediate return of my email or phone call!
I do tell the brides that the priority on the weekends are given to weddings and each and every wedding gets the same treatment. They like it. I also, try not to schedule consultation on fridays, as we work on weddings taking place on the given weekend, and that can compromise any given wedding. They like it.
Pricing the service is individually set by vendors, that’s our source on income. When the couple tell me they pay themselves for the wedding, i always think, i pay myself my overhead, but never say it.
It is not us, not saying that decorators, florist work is a labor intensive, it is the final product that looks so beautiful, magical, simple…, etc; not really showing man hours needed to accomplish that.
As an example, the girl who was applying for position with us to work on wedding setups said ..”Oh, it is so much fun” Yes, it is fun, when you see all finished and see the smile on clients’ face, all before that is hard, hard work.
It is up to us to educate the customers about price structure and what it takes to make the event/wedding happen. I always keep it in mid that they might be like me not knowing, and yes, not caring, about what it takes to repair my car. i only wait to hear, $ and how long its going to take.
Internet, pintrest many time confuses the brides, oh that table setup is in thousands of dollars, and if your budget is below $100, you have to be more realistic with expectations, and settle with less.
Margaret
so true! thank you for writing this!!
Thank you. I adore your posts.
Good article. I am available as much as possible for my clients, their time is as important as mine. If I don’t have a full week end I will meet anytime. Depending on the time of a wedding, if a client can meet up to 2 hours before an event I will meet with them. And yes it is not all fun and games, it is work and worry until it is all finished.
Fantastic information to impart to all brides and vendors too! We cannot always answer your questions, handle your booking or immediately return your calls Friday-Sunday because we are serving other brides. You worded it perfectly and thank you for the reminder, Lauren!
I love you for writing this so well!!!!!
Day off? What’s that? =) I do absolutely love my job and my couples are awesome. I have been so lucky to find great people to work with who are very respectful of my time. I also respect their schedules too so it goes both ways.
This is great! Can I please add/beg that brides not forget to let the “cake lady” know if A.The wedding is canceled. B. Venue was changed and C. The delivery time was changed. So many DIY brides who are great at planning months in advance forget to pass on changes made a month or less before the wedding. Wedding season is not quite half over and this has happened several times! Seriously…who forgets about their wedding cake?
Great post. I appreciate you explaining it so clearly.
So true Lauren! Thanks for sharing and for putting into words what we are thinking but sometimes forget to spell out! :)
AMEN :)
While we make our job seem fun, planning weddings all the time is very stressful! There’s a lot of smoke and mirrors involved. At the end of the day the work behind the scenes doesn’t matter, just the smile on the bride & grooms faces does.
Spot on. Weekends do not exist. We do not mind, though. We usually do not have a problem at all with this. We are lucky that most of our couples can wait half a day and we return the phone call or email even on Sundays and even on holidays on a cruise!. But point 3! The last 3 lines are spot on! Not sure what internet “expert” starting the viral idea that you should ask for discounts. Most of the ones that write this reviews are not even in the industry, the are just SEO people who need to write web content. Every vendor and every country is different. We personally find more serious, a vendor who charges what they charge to everyone, no matter where the client gets married or what their budget is. Open prices where possible for services and products. Then you know, rest assure, that those are the prices are for everyone, for the professional services or products those vendors offer…no need to ask anything and definitely I agree with the “don’t barter and do not talk a product or service down” just because it is not within your budget. Great advise.
True!! Some clients ask me if this is all I do?
What a STUPID QUESTION!!! Editing is much more
time consuming than people realize!!!!!
Can I get an amen?? I was actually just discussing #3 with a fellow planner the other day. You don’t barter with your Dentist or your hair stylist about how much they charge to make a living, do you? We pour our heart and soul into each event we do which is MORE than a “full-time 9-5” job!
What a great post! In regards to tip #1, I’ve been running my themed decor website for a year so I haven’t tried to take off Mondays and Tuesdays yet, instead getting stuff done when I can. I “try” not to answer queries after 7pm on weekdays so they know I have a private life. However, I do currently answer questions on the weekends as I AM working then. And on #3, I offer discounts on multiple purchases and a loyalty program where customers and stylists earn and redeem points on purchases and rentals so that’s the only discounting I do.
I agree with the message above, for the most part. With some vendors, you can afford to wait several days or weeks for a response. Perhaps the icing on your wedding cake can be ironed out closer to the date. The ONE vendor that I’m having issues with is my stationary / invitations vendor. They do fantastic work, and are great about meeting with you and putting your vision together. However, they said they would have a proof back to me in 2 weeks, and it’s been more than 5 weeks. At first, I wasn’t concerned, but I’ve emailed twice in the last week with no response. He said it takes 4-5 weeks for production. I need to have them sent out in 7 weeks. This is leaving a small window for revisions and for addressing the envelopes. Invitation vendors MUST be prompt and understand the urgency for getting invitations out on time. Many things rely on this, such as getting your RSVP numbers in a reasonable amount of time to confirm food, number of favors, number of desserts needed, number of tables needed (and therefore table arrangements), etc.
Great littl article. It is 100% true. Wweekends do not exist. Yes, for some reason or other, people think you can just lower prices upon request. Lol.