Every bride dreams of having the perfect wedding day. Most spend months- even years- planning their one special day. My husband and I had picked a date that was 14 months out from our engagement because we wanted a summer wedding. Having 14 months to plan was both good and bad for me. It was a long time to wait to marry my best friend, but I knew that I didn’t want to plan our day in less than 4 months. I wanted more time to be engaged and to just enjoy that time. I also know how much work goes into planning the day and didn’t want to rush things, making it even more stressful than it needed to be.
For months we thought about how we envisioned our day; the experience we hoped our guests would have and all of the details. After having attended so many weddings ourselves as vendors, we felt like we had an advantage and that we’d seen it all: vendors not showing up, missing bridal party members, lipstick stains on the white wedding dress, and so much more. We’ve witnessed what can (and will) go wrong on wedding days, and the many ways it can be handled. Needless to say, we were confident that we had thought of all the things that could possibly go wrong, and we made backup plans incase they did.
As it turns out, we thought of almost everything- there are only so many things you can plan for. I’m not here to scare you and tell you that something awful will happen, because I’m sure it won’t. But here at ELD, we’re all about the truth, and yes, something small may happen- but trust me, your day will still be great. Today I’m going to share some of the unexpected issues we encountered and how we chose to deal with them…
Get creative.
A few months before our day we got the dreaded email from a bridal party member letting us know that he was no longer able to be in our wedding. For years, I had always told brides that it’s ok to have an uneven bridal party, that it doesn’t look bad in the photos, and that those who can be there are the ones you want there. Never did I think I’d be taking my own piece of advice. I was sad for my fiancé, that one of his friends let him down. I was angry that he waited until three months before the wedding to tell us, but I had to be thankful it wasn’t days before. Most of all, I was simply disappointed. It took me several weeks to get over the fact that there wasn’t a resolution for this situation and that I would just have to let it go. The only real issue it caused was that there was one more bridesmaid than groomsman to walk down the aisle. We solved that by having the first groomsman walk down with two bridesmaids. He didn’t complain one bit and it worked out perfectly!
Have a back-up plan.
For several weeks prior to our day the weather had been most unpleasant. We had days of continuous thunderstorms, rain off and on, and even some flooding in surrounding areas. Planning an outdoor wedding in Minnesota is extremely risky and we knew that from day one. We had picked our venue, Rosenwood Farms, because if it did rain on our wedding day we had the option of moving the ceremony inside the barn, which would have been just as beautiful if it had been outside. That was our back-up plan. Was I a bit worried? Sure. But we had a plan and I was confident that no matter which spot we got married in it would be beautiful.
Trust others (especially your fiancé) and delegate.
Two days before our wedding, a large storm ripped through town taking down several trees at the farm. When we arrived Friday morning to begin decorating we learned that along with the trees, the storm also took out all of the power. Yep- the entire property was without power. That was something I never had even considered happening. It took a few minutes for the shock to wear off, but it wasn’t long before we were playing the “learn about generators” game. My fiancé had decided that I needed to focus on the decorations and that I should leave the power situation up to him and our coordinator, and that’s exactly what happened. I am very thankful for him taking charge of the surprising situation because it was one less thing I needed to figure out and it allowed me to keep moving things forward. I trusted that any decision he made would be the right one.
Image by Leo Evidente Photography
Stay positive.
Everyone who was helping out with our wedding reassured me that even without power the party would be amazing. I never freaked out or panicked- I literally kept saying to myself and everyone one else, “Alright, we’re rolling with it!” By the end of the day, two generators were set in place and a third was arriving in the morning. It wasn’t an easy task but they took charge and made best of an unwelcome surprise. Even to this day, many of our guests don’t know that we were without power and had to scramble to make things happen. And regardless of that fact, they all had a great time.
Just let it go.
It was minutes before I was about to walk down the aisle. I was sitting in the house alone, watching the guests take their seats through the window. I was filling with excitement. My mother came to join me as she was about to walk me down the aisle. I was fortunate enough to have the experience of watching our bridal party walk down the aisle (many brides don’t get that opportunity). As we got up to walk out of the house, I realized that she was not wearing her wrist corsage. I had a moment of panic because it was then that I also realized that none of the groomsmen had their boutonnieres on either. What the heck happened to the flowers?! As I took my mother’s arm I asked, “Where are your flowers?!” She just shrugged and said, “They were lost.” I was in disbelief. Lost? Really? How does one lose so many flowers? That’s when I heard my song start to play; it was time. There was nothing that could be done at this point. What was I going to do? Stop the ceremony so they could be found? Feeling frustrated and confused I just took a deep breath and said, “Ok, then that’s how it’s going to be. I’m sorry you don’t have flowers Mama.” Tears welled in her eyes and she said to me, “You’re the only flower I need.”
There were other little surprises that happened that we didn’t plan for, but none of those things mattered enough to ruin the best day of our lives. Our power-outage story is something that comes up all of the time. Sure, on that day it was frustrating and even a bit scary, but today, we know it’s what made our wedding even more special. I hope that your day is absolutely perfect, I really, really do. But if it’s not, just remember that you have the ability to make that surprising situation good or bad. You can choose to let it ruin your day or choose to just let it go. I highly recommend just letting it go, knowing that someday you’ll look back and laugh about it.
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So do you have any plans in place in case unexpected issues arise on your wedding day? Share them in the comments- you might help out someone else! :)
Jessica
Latest posts by Jessica (see all)
- How To Handle Unexpected Issues On Your Wedding Day - November 14, 2013
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- Overcoming the Overwhelming of Planning A Wedding - September 12, 2013
I absolutely love the story about your flowers and your mother’s comment. Made tears well up in MY eyes! Thank you so much for this awesome post. This really puts things in perspective.
Wonderful information! Thank you for sharing!
xo
Yes! Delegate! and then just let go. Spot on advice!